Beauty For Ashes

...he will give a crown of beauty for ashes. Isaiah 61:3

Burning the tallgrass prairie in NE Kansas

in the spring, which leads to new growth

the rest of the season!

My engagement was over.  And like the YouTube clip of the "Destruction of the USS Enterprise" in my last post (Coming to the End of Myself), my life felt shattered. My "destruction" wasn't visibly spectacular like the Enterprise as it blazed through the atmosphere towards Earth, but emotionally it seemed like it. I felt alone and sad. Such was my life in August 2002, and I didn't bounce back quickly either (as some of my friends know).

But God was using this situation to break several of my dysfunctional habits. Or as John Eldredge describes it in Wild at Heart, God was shattering my false self. One thing God destroyed was my belief that I was inferior. Although I felt incredibly inferior right after the breakup (I felt rejected, after all), God taught me that I was valued by him, and in Christ I was inferior to no one. Learning this was not just through an intellectual analysis of the Scriptures, although they certainly speak of our incredible value to God. My learning this was also at the heart level, through personal revelation from God (through a sort of vision). He didn't speak audibly but his communication with me was so personal and real that I now have no doubt of my worth to him. Although I sometimes still struggle with feeling inferior, I know in my deepest heart that I am not inferior but rather a child of the King of kings!

This Sunday is Easter (Resurrection) Sunday. As Christians, we believe that Jesus was literally resurrected from the dead (1). Think of it, power over death! This fills me with incredible wonder!! Because of Christ's resurrection, we know and are promised that we too will one day be resurrected (2). And if Jesus has power over death, he can certainly bring clarity and healing to the mess that we make of our lives! He can make all things new! (3) The Scriptures tell us that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun! (4) And although the process won't be completed until we arrive in heaven, we don't have to wait till then for the healing and restoration to begin.

But before God can begin our restoration, our old life has to be dealt with. Watchman Nee put it this way: God sets us free from the dominion of sin, not by strengthening our old man, but by crucifying him; not by helping him do anything but by removing him from the scene (5).  Or as Paul, the former Christian slayer himself said My old self has been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me (6).

In August 2002 my life seemed to be ashes, emotionally almost without hope. But God can work good through all things to those who love him (7), and he used that tragedy to bring new life to me. I now know my worth in Jesus. And in 2007 I married a beautiful woman, and we are very happy!

Happy Easter!!

Footnotes:


(1)  Matthew 28:1-10.
(2)  But the truth is that Christ has been raised up, the first in a long legacy of those who are going to leave the cemeteries.  (1 Corinthians 15:20)
(3) Revelation 21:5.
(4)  2 Corinthians 5:17.
(5) Watchman Nee, in The Normal Christian Life.
(6) Galatians 2:20.
(7) Romans 8:28.